Pear Glace by Victoria’s Secret

The much-beloved, long-discontinued Pear Glace was Victoria’s Secret’s indie sister to other more popular fragrances like Love Spell and Sensual Blush. It was for the girl who wanted to smell sweet, but also a little more complex like grass or some shit. She cried when her tamagotchi died and now has a budding interest in pop punk bands.

She’s not quite ready to put away her trolls, but she is ready to make out with a poster of only the Madden brothers (duh) in Good Charlotte. The body mist weaves its way into her fantasies of meeting them outside a concert with no chaperone. They’ll spot her in a Minor Threat t-shirt and know she’s the real deal. On the tour bus with the help of Pear Glace she will seduce them plus all the members of Sum 41. The dream fades out after some heavy over-the-shirt-touching because she’s not quite sure how sex works yet, but smelling sweet AND complex takes you halfway there. This is the scent you wear on the cusp of fourteen as you recall your darkest fantasies in your LiveJournal. Furiously typing in the soft glow of your clamshell iBook you cautiously choose the mood for your entry—you choose “discontent” and publish the piece.

Notes include pear nectar, cassis and violet. In real life you’ll smell like sugared pear and getting picked last in freshman year gym class.